SMILIELANDTV

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This week in the Smilieland tv cake shop............................................ 1st man enters room :- Man at counter :- "Good day sir how may I help you?" 1st man :- " I would like a gerbil please" man at counter :- "this is a cake shop sir" 1st man :- "you don't sell gerbils then?" man at counter :- " no sir only cakes" 1st man :- " call yourself a cake shop, what kind of cake shop doesn't sell gerbils ? man at counter " This shop sir and I suggest you go to a pet shop if you would like a gerbil" 1st man with curiosity in his eyes states :- "Do you have any budgies then?" man at counter :- " NO NOW I SUGGEST YOU LEAVE" 1st man :- This is not a very good cake shop is it? " 1st man walks out. 2nd man enters the shop 2nd man :- "Could I have a horse please" Man at counter "of course sir would you like that boxed?" 2nd man "yes please" man at counter hands over a huge horse wrapped in brown paper 2nd man "Thank you" 2nd man leaves shop 1st man enters shop again 1st man :- " You just sold that man a horse" man at counter "no I never" 1st man "yes you did I just saw him leave with a horse" man at counter "Ah but it wasn't a gerbil was it?" 1st man " but you said you only sold cakes" man at counter " we do unless its 11am exactly then we sell horses" woman enters shop:- "Good day could I have a guinea pig please?" man at counter "would you like salad cream with that" woman :- "Not today thank you" 1st man " you can't sell her a guinea pig, on a Friday" man at counter :- "why not sir" 1st man :- "Its sacrilege that's why, its gerbil day today" man at counter:- " no it was gerbil day yesterday, its always gerbil day on a Thursday" woman:- "everyone knows that. Goodbye" woman walks out of shop 1st man :- "can I have an apple pie then"? man at counter :- certainly sir, would you like a wasp with that" 1st man :- why not, yes go on I'll have a wasp with it" man at counter hands 1st man a small package and wishes him well on his journey 1st man "bye" 1st man leaves shop man at counter looks at clock sighs and says "nearly time for penguin feeding".

 

 

Bartender: Good day Sir 1st Man: Hi can I have a beer please? Bartender: Of course sir what kind of beer would that be then? 1st man: Lucozade plese? Bartender: Sorry Sir but we do not sell Lucozade flavoured beer. 1st Man: Ok bartender then I'll just have a lucozade then please? Bartender: Sorry Sir we don't sell lucozade either. 1St Man: Ok give me some crips then please? Bartender: What flavour crisps would you like Sir? 1st Man: Oh just give me some lucozade flavour. Bartender: We don't do Lucozade crisps. 1st Man: You don't do much do you? Bartender: This is a bar Sir we sell beer & spirits and snacks and also hot and cold food if you require it. 1st Man: Yes but you don't do anything much else do you? Drunk at the end of bar: They sell nuts too! 2nd Man: And quavers 3rd Man: And Wotsits 1st Man: That's all good and well but they don't sell Lucozade. Drunk at the end of bar: They do! 1st Man: Where is it then? Drunk at the end of bar: I drank it all! 1st Man: You drank it all? 2nd Man: I drank some too 3rd Man: And I ate the crisps 1st Man: Will you be getting any more in soon Bartender? Bartender: No Sir 1st man: Why not? Bartender: Because theselot keep eating and drinking it all away. If I've told them once I've told them a dozen times, Don't drink the lucozade it's for the kids. 1st Man: it's not for kids Batender: It is 1st Man: No it's not Bartender: yes it is because i've seen them drinking it. 1st Man: where? Bartender: In here. 2nd man: If they can get it Drunk at the end of bar: hicup! 1st man: This is ridiculas i'm going to another bar where they sell lucozade. Bartender: There is no where else. {Bartender opens back door and the Lucozade factory is shown with all the workers doing their jobs and loading up crates.} Drunk at the end of bar: Hiccup! Kid walks past and sniggers!!

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